Ah, the noble art of SUCKRIFICE—giving up what you actually want for something that sucks. Whether it’s staying in a job you hate, skipping vacations to pay bills, or drinking water instead of iced coffee, this bottle is here to support you through every begrudging decision.
This 32 oz. water bottle is built for the overworked, underpaid, and perpetually exhausted. With a wide mouth for easy ice refills and a sturdy handle for on-the-go hydration, it’s your trusty sidekick as you suckrifice your sanity for survival.
Why You Need This Bottle (Besides the Crushing Weight of Responsibility)
💧 32 oz. of Liquid Disappointment – Because hydration is cheaper than therapy.
🧊 Wide Mouth for Easy Filling – Ice, fruit, or the bitter taste of lost dreams.
💪 BPA-Free & Durable – Unlike your will to go to work.
🎒 Handle for Easy Carrying – So you can drag yourself through another day.
🚫 Hand-Wash Only – Because life is already hard enough.
⚠️ Warning: May cause existential crises. Side effects include staying hydrated while questioning all your life decisions.
Part of The DICKTIONARY Collection by Calmed By CHAOS—because some sacrifices just suck.
Size guide
| |
WIDTH (inches) |
LENGTH (inches) |
| 32 oz |
2 ½ |
8 ¼ |
| |
WIDTH (cm) |
LENGTH (cm) |
| 32 oz |
6.4 |
20.8 |
